How to Act Like a Homosexual to Insure Employment in Washington DC

Are you considering a job working in Washington, DC for the United States of America government? As you know if you are a minority or perhaps a homosexual you may actually have a better chance of getting a job in Washington, DC.
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The problem is if you are not a minority or a homosexual you need to figure out a way to at least look as if you are. If you are a white person it may be hard to look like a minority especially if you have a white person's name. However, there are homosexuals of every race and religion and to therefore your best bet may be to act like a homosexual in order to get a job.
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In fact, many government agencies are afraid not to hire homosexuals for fear of lawsuits and to make sure that they do not prejudge or discriminate against people due to sexual preference. If you are a male it is best to talk about other males during the interview and talk about a significant other but never mention the fact that you are married to an actual woman. Another way to look like you are a homosexual is to move your hands around a lot and when you are talking and talking in a very caring voice like a woman might.
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If you use words like wonderful and beautiful you might have a better shot. There are other words like abundant, festive and colorful that you should drop into your speech. If you have a hard time relating with homosexuals perhaps you can go to a gay bar in Washington, DC as there are so many. Just sit there and listen for an hour or so to the way that the homosexual stock and then you will know how to get along in Washington, DC by mimicking their speech patterns.
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Truthfully, this is the best way to get a job in Washington, DC if you are a white male and you can do this without ever saying you're a homosexual. Just let the interviewer inferred that you might be. Congratulations on your new job working in the federal government.

Lance Winslow